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I have strung words together for The New York Times, Vice, and more. I write and shoot people (with a camera, you guys) from my home in upst...

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    Post by Jeanne Sager
    You know, when Snooki first announced she was pregnant, the world erupted in screams of WHY? But the second episode of Snooki & JWOWW has finally given us the answer. Snooki got pregnant so we would be able to laugh, hysterically no less, at the kind of thoughts on motherhood and pregnancy that Snooki offers the world.

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    Post by Jeanne Sager
    Say what you will about Jenny McCarthy, but her sixth Playboy cover proves this mom has still got it. Got sex appeal that is. Sense, on the other hand? Well let's just look at what Jenny thinks of her son getting a look-see at his naked mama. McCarthy says she has no problem with 10-year-old son Evan one day finding her various Playboy poses. Nudity, she says, isn't such a big deal, because you can find stuff that is so much worse on the Internet. True enough, but generally you don't find your own mother, naked, on the Internet. And more to the point: neither do your friends!

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    Post by Jeanne Sager
    For a week, 4-year-old Carnel Chamberlain was a missing child. But police say he's been found, dead, beneath the porch of his own house! I think it's safe to say this isn't the ending anyone wanted. But as I read through the back story on the Michigan boy who never had a chance to grow up, I was struck by the week that his mom, Jaimee Chamberlain, had. For a week, she didn't know where her son was. And yet, for an extra week, I hope she held out hope that he was alive.

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    Post by Jeanne Sager
    Did you ever see one of those moms walking around with her daughter in matching "mommy and me" outfits and cringe? OK, maybe not cringe. Point and laugh behind their backs, maybe? I did too. Until it was me. Yes. I went out in public wearing clothes that matched my daughter's, and I managed not to look like a complete idiot. So how did I do it?

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    Post by Jeanne Sager
    Good news. People Like Us is going to tell you the truth. Families suck, the whole lot of them. But we love them anyway. It's the premise behind the new Dreamworks summer tearjerker (remember what they did to us last year with The Help? They're trying to do it again!). Elizabeth Banks and Chris Pine are going to make you feel like you're in a tennis match as you bing-bong back and forth between laughing and crying ... but you're going to hate the reason they were brought together in the first place.

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  • 06/29/12--11:01: Being a Mom Is Boring
  • Post by Jeanne Sager
    Something tells me mom and writer Julie Cook is about to get a lot of hate mail. She came out this week in the British tabloid the Daily Mail with a story about the drudgery of motherhood. The headline? "I love my son, but being a mother bores me." G'head and hate on her ladies -- plenty of people already are -- but I'm not joining you. For one, I doubt Cook even wrote the provocative headline (little writer's secret here: often we don't). For another? I happen to agree with her. Motherhood, especially early motherhood, is awfully boring.

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    Post by Jeanne Sager
    Attention parents! When someone with a really weird story wants to move into your house, you might want to think twice before you say yes! Here's betting the mother of a 15-year-old boy stalked across an ocean by a 25-year-old British alleged child molester is wishing she had. Police in St. Augustine, Florida say 25-year-old Michael Hunter came all the way from his home in Birmingham, England, to have sex with a 15-year-old American boy he'd met on the Internet. When he pretended to be 17-year-old Gary Johnson, a classmate with cancer, the 15-year-old's mom let the alleged pedophile move into their house. Which part of this sounds bizarre to you? All of it?

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    Post by Jeanne Sager
    If I've learned anything from my daughter when she pages through a toy store catalog, it's that kids like to have toys that look like them! And now all the little kids who were forced to go bald -- from cancer or some other disease -- have a new friend in the folks at American Girl. The company has introduced its first ever bald doll for kids to cuddle! They come in a variety of skin tones so every kid gets one who looks just like them. Oh, and if you've already shelled out the mega bucks to get your kiddo an American Girl doll that has locks, they'll retro-fit the body with a new hairless head. How cool is that?

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    Post by Jeanne Sager
    Can we talk about Kate Upton for a second? I keep hearing that the GQ cover model with the hot body is bringing back voluptuous. No offense to Kate, y'all, but I wasn't aware she had to bring it back! Let me close the troll trap before I get going. I'm not bashing on curvy Kate Upton. And if you think I'm jealous of her, you are darn right. Have you seen the "Cat Daddy" video and the Baywatch clip of her GQ shoot with celeb photographer Terry Richardson? Va. Va. Voom.

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    Post by Jeanne Sager
    They call it the salt and ice challenge. This addition to the "what will teens come up with next" files might better be named "stupid, dangerous, and a sign we need to improve our science curriculum in this country." You know what happens when salt and ice combine in real life? That's right, a reaction very similar to a chemical reaction. And when that reaction between the cold and the salt is happening on the bare skin of a teenager, you get something like the horrific burns that will make the summer miserable for one young salt and ice "challenger" who landed in the West Penn Burn Center last week because he took his friends' dare. Oh, yeah ... he got off easy.

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    Post by Jeanne Sager
    If swimming with sharks sounds like your kind of vacation activity, congratulations. You're officially a lot braver than me. Now for the big question: would you bring your 5-year-old daughter along? The parents of 5-year-old Anaia did. And they actually let her swim off without them, bobbing in the water with an instructor from the shark swim adventure company and, of course, the sharks. I guess that makes them braver than me too. But does it make them crazy?

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    Post by Jeanne Sager
    As if the on-again-off-again relationship Teen Mom 2 star Jenelle Evans has had going with one-time fiance Gary Head wasn't enough evidence that this girl just can't stay away from trouble, there's a new twist for the file. Kieffer Delp. 'Memba him? He's baaaaaaack! Just to catch you up -- because with Jenelle it can get confusing -- Kieffer is Jenelle's ex-boyfriend. You know, the one who she was once ordered to stay away from by an actual judge because of his association with drugs, and their coupled arrests on the same night a few years back?

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    Post by Jeanne Sager
    It's hard out there for a new mom. You're bored. You're overwhelmed. You're exhausted. And now for the good news. The research gods have given us a safe and easy fix for the new mom blues! The thing you're doing right now, sitting in front of a computer screen, reading something on the Internet? Pat yourself on the back, Mom, this is exactly what you should be doing now. Then schedule yourself some Facebook time. You deserve it. And don't let anyone tell you different m'kay?!

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    Post by Jeanne Sager
    A military plane that crashed in South Dakota on Sunday night is yet another tragic tale of the wildfires that have been raging in the nation's heartland. An Air National Guard unit out of North Carolina had sent several planes in to help fight the flames, only to have the C-130 disappear from radar during its second run of the day. Right now the military will say only that three crewmembers were rescued and taken to a hospital for treatment, but they're reportedly trying to track down families before revealing anymore. Other reports put an even more horrifying light on the crash. If claims that there were six crewmembers on that crashed plane are true, as many as three members of the Air National Guard may have died in the line of duty.

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    Post by Jeanne Sager
    It took hours of searching, but police found a missing little girl in the early hours of Saturday morning. One-year-old Zyia Roch-Quelle Alyssa Turner hadn't left her grandmother's Detroit home at all, it seems. The baby was found inside the closet, buried under some 20 pounds of clothing. It's a heartbreaking end to what is already a sad story. Zyia's family called police late Friday afternoon, thinking she was gone. It would take hours for police to find her body inside the house ... after they searched the neighborhood.

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    Post by Jeanne Sager
    Being a good sport doesn't come naturally. But the sound of a kid whining, "No fair, no fair, no fair" is the bratty child equivalent of nails on a chalkboard. Add in a video game console, and a kid at the next table in the restaurant who doesn't know how to lose gracefully, and all my good humor goes right out the window. Video games are supposed to be fun. Yeah, yeah, the scientists have found behavior benefits to gaming over the years, and you can get your kids some educational games. But the real point of sitting there smashing on some keys with your fingers is for pleasure, right? So maybe it's time you taught your kid about losing gracefully so they can get back to actually having some fun?

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    Post by Jeanne Sager
    Are you getting excited about the Fourth of July? It's the birthday of our nation, and you're probably pulling out the sparklers, scrubbing down the grill, and loading up the coolers, right? Me? I'm packing the tissues. I'm going to need them to help get through that overwhelming feeling of pride that bubbles up inside of me at being an American. Yes, I know, it is corny! But every July 4th, without fail, I cry. All it takes is the first strains of "God Bless America," and I am a blubbering mess, but I'm a patriotic one! And here are some of the patriotic quotes that seem to sum up July 4th for me this year.

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    Post by Jeanne Sager
    Justin Bieber has put the world on notice. He may be a high school graduate, but the teenage singer respects his mom! The Biebs hung up on radio personality Mojo during a recent interview when the show host made a sexual your mom joke. Good for him! Mojo, who hosts the eponymous Mojo in the Morning, was talking about the guys from One Direction when he made reference to band member Harry Styles' penchant for dating older women. The DJ then asked Bieber if Styles would be seducing Pattie Mallette, the teenager's 36-year-old single mom. Take a listen:

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    Post by Jeanne Sager
    Bet you didn't think the "sexing up young girls" trend could get any creepier, did you? Ah, if only ... because the bikini romper from Bon Bebe is pretty much dripping with sleaze. And yup, it's made for a baby girl. Unlike the baby bikinis that make me roll my eyes (seriously y'all, your daughter doesn't actually have anything there to hold that top UP), the romper is made to fit the average baby body. The creep factor comes in when you look at the design on the front -- a woman's hourglass figure with a bikini drawn on. And unlike your baby, this woman definitely can fill out that swimsuit top Yup, she's a busty babe on your little babe., and all I've got to ask is why?

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    Post by Jeanne Sager
    Need a happy story to get you going after the awkward mid-week holiday? This ought to do it for you. Louisiana mom Amber Scott slipped into a coma before doctors delivered her baby girl by C-section back in May, but now she's awake! And she finally got to see little Adeline! Sniff. Sniff. Oh, I know, I know, I said it was a happy story. But I've got some happy tears streaming down my face because the story actually gets even better! Just listen to this one folks!

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