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I have strung words together for The New York Times, Vice, and more. I write and shoot people (with a camera, you guys) from my home in upst...

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    Post by Jeanne Sager
    If you have ever Googled your own name, join the club. We all have done it. Most of us, however, haven't found the horrors that police say 42-year-old Paul Mason had put out on the web: photos of teenage girls digitally altered and then uploaded to a porn site. Mason is a former police officer, karate instructor, and church's youth leader. He's now the main suspect at the center of a child porn case, making him every parent's worst nightmare.

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    Post by Jeanne Sager
    To read Donald Trump's Twitter this week, you'd almost think he let a sixth grader take over the keyboard. But no, it seems that the 66-year-old business magnate was indeed responsible for a Tweet that called Arianna Huffington ugly this week. No more wondering if chivalry is dead, folks. I believe she's been taken out behind the barn and put down. Grown men are showing their anger at critical news stories by picking on the publisher's looks. What's next? Will the Trumpster ask someone to give him a cootie shot (that's circle, circle, dot ...)?

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    Post by Jeanne Sager
    It was as if Mitt Romney's wife was once again fighting the mommy war with Democratic pundit Hilary Rosen last night. Ann Romney took to the podium at the RNC Convention in Tampa with a message for the mothers of America: no matter what your job is, you're still "just" a mom. Romney's "woman behind the man" speech was a hit with Republican women who spoke with CafeMom Studios from the convention floor. Not surprisingly, the moms interviewed talked of how Ann Romney is the perfect person to show what a wonderful man her husband is.  And yet, as she talked up her man and tried to relate to women, Ann Romney did no favor to either gender.

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    Post by Jeanne Sager
    Have you heard about Honey Boo Boo? Wait, of course you have. Six-year-old Alana Thompson's reality show is absolutely killing it in the ratings. Perhaps the better question is: what have you heard about Honey Boo Boo? Have you heard her called a fatty? Or maybe you've heard someone refer to the 6-year-old as "the ugliest child I've ever seen"? Let me remind you one more time: Honey Boo Boo is just 6 years old.

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    Post by Jeanne Sager
    There's much ado right now about No Easy Day, a memoir of the mission to kill Osama bin Laden that's said to be written by a member of SEAL Team 6 under the pseudonym Mark Owen. The book will no doubt fly off shelves when it's released in September because of what it represents: a seminal moment in our nation's history. But it seems the importance of the event has already been lost in the hullabaloo over the difference in the events related in the book from those provided by the Obama administration. They both agree that Osama bin Laden is dead (thank heavens). But the devil, as they say, seems to be in the details.

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    Post by Jeanne Sager
    How's this for strangest lawsuit of the week? A dentist is being sued for allegedly leaving braces on a kid for 11 years, leaving the poor kid with a mouth full of rotten teeth. That got your attention, didn't it? Most kids I know who went through the metal mouth period were forced to wear them for two years, maybe three if their teeth were a truly crooked mess. Eleven years sounds insane, at best. But the story Devin Bost is telling sounds like it's missing a big piece. Namely: where were his parents during all of this?

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    Post by Jeanne Sager
    It may have been the "go-go juice" concoction of Mountain Dew and Red Bull that brought the world's attention to 6-year-old Alana Thompson, but it turns out Honey Boo Boo isn't the only kid who sucks down soda. It appears they start giving out questionable treats really young in this Georgia household. And by young I mean newborn babies. Photos of reality TV's newest celebrities that popped up on the web this week show 12-year-old Pumpkin poking a baby's pacifier into a can of Mountain Dew. Then what do you know, you see newborn baby Kaitlyn -- the daughter of 17-year-old Anna -- sucking on what appears to be the same pacifier.

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    Post by Jeanne Sager
    Is there anything more stressful than giving a baby their first bath? How about finding out that the baby bath you thought was going to make this whole experience easier had been recalled? Because sweet little babies were falling and fracturing their skulls? Yikes! We're there folks: popular baby bather maker Summer Infant has partnered up with the Consumer Product Safety Commission to recall more than 2 million baby baths. At least seven children have been seriously hurt when the wire frame of the recalled bather suddenly disengaged from the side hinge, dropping the baby. In one case, the infant who fell was so badly hurt that he required intensive care for bleeding on the brain. Want to know how to keep your baby safe? Here's everything you need to know about this recall:

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    Post by Jeanne Sager
    There's no easy way to talk about curtailing the rights of the elderly. No one wants to think about taking Grandpa's driver's license, least of all Grandpa himself. But the 100-year-old driver who backed into a crowd of school children in Los Angeles this week is like a car horn sounding, waking us up to the fact that, uncomfortable or not, this is a conversation we need to be having. Cops say Preston Carter, who will be 101 in a few days, hit a total of 11 people, nine of them kids, as he backed his Cadillac onto a sidewalk near an elementary school. Four of those kids had to be rushed to the hospital in serious condition.

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    Post by Jeanne Sager
    Ann Romney has been front and center at the Republican National Committee's convention in Tampa this week with a mission: to talk up Mitt Romney the "husband" and Mitt Romney the "father" to humanize the candidate. But after Ann's Stepford Wife-style speech about motherhood the other day, she's continued to dig a hole for the former Massachusetts governor. The latest bit of questionable parenting involves the age-old spanking debate. No surprise the Romneys are spankers. They seem like old school parents all the way. But it's the way Ann practically bragged about her husband "whacking" their five sons' "bums" that really gets me.

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    Post by Jeanne Sager
    As a photographer, I have probably taken thousands of photos of my daughter over the years, and I've never once asked my husband what I can do with them. But the latest wrinkle in the very public and very nasty Heidi Klum and Seal divorce has me wondering if we shouldn't have a big talk ... and get it in writing.  It seems Seal granted camera company Leica the use of personal photos of their children for an ad campaign. When Heidi told the company she didn't like it, they pulled the ads. But Seal is still saying he has the rights to those photos.

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    Post by Jeanne Sager
    If the whole pedophile priests scandal that's rocked the Catholic church in recent years wasn't bad enough, now they have a rogue priest on their hands making it worse. In an interview that seems to have been scrubbed from the National Catholic Register, a priest named Father Benedict Groeschel tried to blame the whole debacle on the teenagers themselves. In short? Father Benedict said the young victims of pedophile priests have been "seducing" the adult friars. Oh, right, the "he made me do it" excuse. What is this, third grade?

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    Post by Jeanne Sager
    It should be an easy question. Is it OK for someone else to buy your teenager alcohol? What if something goes wrong when your child is drunk? Whose fault is it? Well, a teenage boy is dead after cops say he got drunk and wandered into a roadway where he lay down and was struck by an oncoming car. And now it's up to a prosecutor to decide if two women, both aged 22, are responsible for letting a 16-year-old get hold of alcohol at their party. The women could be on the hook for Tyler Gonzalez' death.

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    Post by Jeanne Sager
    I probably shouldn't admit this: but as much as back-to-school time puts a song in my step, I was dreading having to pack my daughter's lunch for school. We're committed to the "lunch from home" thing to make sure she gets something healthy, but sometimes even I'm bored by what I put in her bag. Oh gee, look what it is! Another apple/box of raisins/string cheese/turkey on wheat? It's no wonder my husband and I tend to "forget" that it's our turn to make lunch so the other ends up on the hook. We need to liven things up -- for her sake and ours!

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    Post by Jeanne Sager
    The rainbow cake has become legendary in certain circles. Hit up Pinterest, and there are hundreds of pins for dazzling towers of cake in magnificent colors. Which is all well and good if you're one of those Martha types who can actually replicate a Pinterest picture. But what about the rest of us? Is there a rainbow cake that those of us who go into birthday planning mode with the best of intentions and always end up ripping our hair out at 2 a.m. because the cake looks nothing like the picture? Good news! There is! I have a rainbow cake that is so easy even a 7-year-old could do it (well, OK, mine helped!)! And it's paired with the best cream cheese frosting I've ever tasted! So what's the secret?

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    Post by Jeanne Sager
    You never know what you're going to find on the beach. If you're lucky it's a perfect conch shell. Not so lucky, and you end up with a dirty syringe. But the kid who found a huge chunk of whale vomit may just take the "craziest beach find ever" prize. And it could get crazier. There are estimates out there that this rock hard whale puke could bring in thousands of clams. Some are even saying little Charlie Naysmith could bring in something in the $60,000 range. How's that for a whale of a tale (sorry, I just had to ...)? Actually, this whole thing is not that crazy, at least to people who are in the know about whale vomit. The stuff that a sperm whale regurgitates has an actual name and an actual use in regular every day society. In fact, you might even be wearing some whale vomit right now.

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    Post by Jeanne Sager
    Attention, parents! You do not have to give your kid a bizarre baby name to screw them up. All you have to do is admit that their perfectly normal name was born of some not-so-normal inspiration. Take the mom who named her daughter after a stripper. The girl ended up with the name Savannah, which is perfectly lovely (and not one of those prototypical stripper names ... you know which ones I'm talking about!). But now she's bound to find out that her mom's muse makes her money by taking her clothes out. And it's all mom's fault!

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    Post by Jeanne Sager
    It's been like a game of tennis in the Heidi Klum and Seal divorce this holiday weekend. Only instead of a ball being beaten back and forth, it's Heidi. First came the allegation that she was cheating before the couple separated. Then Seal quickly saying that his accusation that she's been "fornicating with the help" did NOT mean his wife had been cheating with her bodyguard. And now we have reached game point: rumors have it Seal is just lashing out because he really doesn't want his marriage to end. Could Seal really just want Heidi back? Well gee, I don't know. He's been married to Heidi Klum. Let's repeat that: HEIDI KLUM! Have you seen that woman's post-babies body? She's a world class model. Of course she isn't just that. While I can't comment on her personality or character, let's remember who Heidi is to Seal.

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    Post by Jeanne Sager
    We could all do with a lesson from actor Russell Crowe this holiday. When in doubt, go with humble. It works every time. The way Crowe reacted when he got lost in Long Island Sound and had to be rescued by members of the US Coast Guard certainly helps put him back on my list of actors I'd like to watch. The New Zealand-born actor grabbed a Golden Globe nomination back in the 2003 for playing a sea captain in Master and Commander: The Far Side of the World. But Crowe was a little out of his depths with a kayak in the waters of Huntington Bay Saturday evening.

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    Post by Jeanne Sager
    So, Jay-Z and Kanye West appeared in concert together in Philadelphia this weekend, and the two besties had a total bromance going on onstage. But the way the gossip rags tell it, the mushy gushy feelings did not leak over to Kanye's girlfriend Kim Kardashian and Jay-Z's wife Beyonce. The ladies had pretty much nothing to do with one another, leading them all to unload a heaping helping of pity on poor Kim K's shoulders because Bey gave her the cold shoulder. Ahem, sorry to pop the balloons and trash the streamers, but is the pity party really in order here? This isn't ninth grade, y'all: it's OK for couples to ... gasp ... have their own friends!

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